Monday, 24 August 2009
The Queen and Prince Philip
One might jump to the conclusion that the Queen is clearly punching below her weight due to the fact that Prince Phillip is, by all accounts, a massive racist. But, in my experience, every single person in the whole world over the age of seventy despises everyone of a different ethnic background to themselves. I bet, with few pints in his belly, Nelson Mandela would start ranting about how nowadays the Poles are taking all the Global Peace Ambassador jobs.
Anyway, riddle me this: how come good ol’ Phil is married to the Queen, but isn’t the King? Why, you may ask, does he put up with this sorry state of affairs? Maybe it’s because of her unimaginable wealth; maybe it’s because he likes dressing up in her ermine trimmed capes when she isn’t around; or maybe he’s been driven wild with lust ever since he got to see her crown jewels on the first date. Whatever it is, it’s got to hurt. I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a man-servant to replace his soggy pillows every night after he’s cried himself to sleep.
But cutting to the chase, you just wouldn’t put up with being the same rank as your good for nothing grandchildren unless you knew you couldn’t do any better. And thus, a simple conclusion has to be drawn:
Prince Philip, you are punching above your weight.